How Can I Save My Marriage From Bitterness
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How Can I Save My Marriage From Bitterness

You might be living in a marriage where your feelings toward your spouse have become bitter. You two might become intolerable to each other when things get worse. Every argument or conflict might make you think of ending this relationship as the only solution.

However, if you both think about mending your relationship and wonder how your marriage can be restored, this is a ray of hope. If you two think that how the offenses made can be forgiven and how the relationship can be rekindled, then there is a chance that you can fix your marriage.

You should also know that fixing this kind of marriage where bitterness has taken place won’t be a walk in the garden. It will test your patience repeatedly and make you stand on the verge of breaking. However, it is your determination that will motivate you every time you are about to give up. Hence you two should make a pact that no matter what happens, you will fix your kundali marriage, and those loving days will come back.

If you both agree on this point, then you can follow the article further.

Bitterness Kills A Marriage Gradually

Just like Cancer deteriorates the body with every passing day, bitterness also burns the roots of the relationship gradually. It only complicates things as time passes by. This is true if both of you have some unresolved conflicts inside you. If both of you remember the past hurts and keep them in your heart, it creates bitterness. If both of you talk to each other while remembering all that has happened, this creates bitterness.

There is always more room for misunderstandings, unforgiveness, and anger when there is bitterness. One small conflict or argument with your spouse can bring back all those memories and trigger you in a way that you might want to hurt your partner in any possible way.

So to fix your marriage, you need to erase this bitterness first. No love can take place when your heart is filled with bitter feelings. You need to have a place for love by replacing it with bitterness.

Step Out The Bitterness And Make Place For Love

The first and foremost step to resolving the conflicts of your marriage is to talk it out. Bitterness usually comes from the unresolved conflicts and hurts that you haven’t discussed with your partner. You need to open yourself up; all the feelings you bottled down need to resurface.

The undiscussed issues are the root cause of your hurt; you both are hurting each other. You need to sit together and bring all the issues to the surface. Create an environment where you two can talk even for hours if needed. You need to stay respectful toward each other and know that you are communicating everything because you want to fix your marriage.

You can pick up any major concern that still hurts you and discuss it with your spouse. Let them know how it still hurts you and how you felt when it happened. Don’t blame them, but let them know that it exists and that it broke you in some way.

Also, allow each other to explain why you offended in such a way and what you were thinking at that time. You need to solve one root cause completely until you move to the next. If things feel too intense, you can take a break of 24 hours or so before discussing another issue.

Make sure that you have both listened to each other’s side and get to know the motivation, intentions, and feelings about a particular issue.

You should then find common ground on which you can agree and resolve the issue before resolving the next conflict.

Both should forgive each other wholeheartedly and consider the issue resolved. The same should not hurt you in the future or become a reason for your fights.


Both might need to repeat this process to resolve all the oppressed issues. There might be chances of arguments, too, when no one is ready to accept their fault. In this case, both parties should take a break until they cool down and feel ready for the discussion.

This will take a strong determination and much time, but it can give you a rekindled marriage and your partner back. This will also take practice and with each issue resolved, you will come closer and closer to each other. Sometimes you might also feel the need to take an expert’s guidance. In that case, you can opt for couple or marriage counseling and share a professional counselor’s perception of your marriage.

This way, gradually and patiently, you will be able to retain your marriage. The bitterness will seek an end, and love will happen.

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